04 December 2008 | 10:28 pm

I'm sitting at home typing!

Are you as hellishly excited as I am? Probably not because you're not a luddite like me and you've probably had the internet at home for years - right?
But it's wireless! Holy guacamole (with beans), that excites me.

Whatevs.

Okay - it's time :

Awesomeness :

+ I heard Mad Gossip today. But of course I can't repeat it because I'm getting better at stuff like that, ok? You heard it here first.
+ I love the words Caveat & Parochial. And Desist too.
+ I'm seeing a Jap Film on Sunday afternoon and it's about a Koala that has a human girlfriend. The Koala is an executive too. The title is Executive Koala. How mad.
+ There's this beautiful print dress that I want to buy but it's all about the Benjamins. There aren't enough, if you know what I mean.
+ Holidays soon!
+ Facebook is Feral. Super Feral.
+ My legs are in such pain, I can't move my quads - Thanks José - who, mind you, uttered Genius yesterday when he said "the pain is worth being gorgeous". I almost dropped my weights laughing.
+ Debating which is worse : Newtown or Surry Hills. They're almost one in the same if you look at it from an analytical level.
+ Thieves Like Us is still being is atmospheric self and it makes me want to sway and then run around night time grimy city breaking into interpretive dance on the subway. At which point Tom Cruise is going to jump on the same train, we'll play a game of duck and cover and then as we pull guns out on each other at exactly the same time, he'll cock his, get ready to fire and as he does he'll realise that he has no more bullets left. At which point I'll pull the trigger on my gun...

02 December 2008 | 9:22 am

I'm having a MOMENT

I had a totally "Greek weekend". That involved talking too much about it and being asked whether I'd live there (answer was an emphatic yes), eating Greek chocolates "σοκοφρετες" - I have so many memories in my childhood revolving around that chocolate (its portrait is above), buying new Greek CDs (thank YOU Μιχαλη) and watching one of the Best Greek Singers ever (don't question it) - Sakis Rouvas dancing in a gold lamé shirt with forty costume changes making lewd gestures at his groin.

I miss Greece. And I'm listening to Greek music now wanting to cry.

We have the internet at home now. That's exciting. I forgot my rings at home. That's not. How naked I feel without them.

Record.

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